The War For Your Identity Homosexuality Healing The Fathers Love w Micah Turnbo

started questioning my identity because didn't feel like got along with boys my age. the enemy is wanting to manipulate, our identity so we lose the joy of the love of God the enemy saying, you want that, that makes you gay. You love to hug, that makes you gay. You love this color, that makes you gay. remember the room being filled with demons. Jesus, please help me. And Jesus appears and his robe is like fire, he's standing tall above me, he took his hand and he began to wave fire above his head Satan wants us to think, you are supposed to be holy because God says be holy as he is holy, and you just did that. you shouldn't pray for little bit. You need to clean yourself off. the Lord was with me through all that. He never left me. some people think, in the midst of our sin, Jesus is not there. when you're finished, sinning then he comes. But he's with you through the whole thing. He hears everything, he sees everything. And loves you so much when he says he'll never leave you, he means it. the feelings, everything. It just was... it just died. it was just gone. And remember thinking, like, Lord, it's it's gone. Jesus, what happened? And Jesus said, All right, welcome back to the Holy Living Podcast. We are here again with our guest, Micah Turnbo. Micah, thank you for coming back. Yes. thank you. Mm-hmm. You're welcome. I'm glad to be here for real. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. So Micah today is gonna share his testimony. And Micah has has been very open on his own channels and and his social media about his struggle with homosexuality, same-sex attraction when he was younger and how the Lord brought him through that. And we just thought that this in this particular month, we we we love people, we have heart for people, we want to share the truth and we want to share how much Jesus loves everybody, including people who who are struggling with that issue, or with that attraction. or even people who don't feel like they're struggling, but just that's they feel "well this is how am and this is this is who am" and you know "hopefully God can accept me or not." But if you're watching this we want you to know that God absolutely loves you. And we want to share this with you and and Micah shares his story with you. for that reason, not in any judgment or condemnation on you. Yeah. And so without further adieu, Micah just wanna let you tell your story. Yeah. And you know we'll ask questions as we go through and just kinda flow with it from there. Mm-hmm. Sure. don't know if it was rather was questioning my identity lot of it started when was eleven years old. which was the same time when had really dramatic encounter with Jesus. You know, believe shared that in one the earlier podcasts where Jesus walked into my room, picked me up and and and laid on his chest. so around that same time was really qu started questioning my identity because didn't feel like got along with boys my age. and thought that like mean my favorite colors were bright colors, pink and purple and you know loved To even like had action figures and love to take my sister got so mad at me, but what we would take our my sister's Barbie dolls and we would play with them. And my younger brother did whatever did, but we would play with her Barbie dolls and make them be the wives to our action figures. So we had an action man, and so of course action man's an action-oriented guy, backflips and stuff, and so we would toss the Toss their Barbies in the air and mess them up. And my sister would be like, don't mess with our Barbies, you know. but also love to comb their hair and make, you know, pick out their outfits and things like that. And so just wasn't sure, like, I'm not really liking the same things that, you know, boys my age were liking. You know, took martial arts, but took it because loved the movement, not really 'cause wanted to be eat anybody up, you know. yeah, you know, was picked on and bullied, you know, at times and used it when could to get people off of me. But just was was just different. was wired differently. And attached to that, you know, could see and sense the spirit world, you know, but was just wired so differently. And remember really wanting friend. yeah, really wanting friend. would sometimes there was neighbor friend in our neighborhood and would hang out with him and would hang out with him because he was had fun, you know, but still didn't feel like clicked. was the same. And so would started he probably would remember this. would pretend was an angel. That could disappear like an angel because just knew that like understood angels. understood how they operated, you know. So was like, I'm just gonna pretend I'm an angel. So would would like he would walk away and go get something that would pretend to disappear, you know, and then he'd be like, where'd you go? And I'm like, I'm back. You know, but all of that was me trying to search for where belong. You know, who could understand me because felt like was always in between two worlds. was in between the physical world, you know, and then the spirit world, you know. but where did fit? so would just ask the Lord, please send me friend. want to be want friend. would go around the block and just pray that, you know, Lord, want friend, you know. And remember having this dream where was riding my bicycle around the neighborhood and in the dream was riding and there was Jesus and he was walking next to me while was riding my bicycle, but couldn't understand like, how is he keeping up with me? You know, because I'm trying felt like was going fast, you know. But he kept up with me the whole time and he would just talk to me and would talk to him. And but was like, he can't be my friend, you know, he's God. You know, why would he want to be my friend? And so remember trying to run away from him in the dream and would pedal really fast, really fast down the hills and things. And he just it was like he he ne he never ran. He just kept walking. He just was stayed there, you know, with me. And then remember tripping or yeah, like crashing in my bike and going over the handles. And the Lord caught me in his arms and he said, will always be your friend. He said, will always be your friend. If you need someone to play with, I'll play with you. So had that dilemma of who's gonna be my friend and that there was inner wound there. And you know, some people say and it it happens, you know, where inappropriate behavior happens to the someone. you know, who's young and whether it's abuse or something. That didn't happen to me. You know, my parents were loving, but they were believers. They loved us. You know, we were in obviously talk about we were in beautiful home. so it was just lie that was accepting in my mind. You know, lie that was accepting in my mind. And the core of that lie was, am not enough. You know, and so the Lord started to started this journey of of trying to figure out what does it mean to be enough, you know? am enough? or am always just going to always not fit in, you know, because I'm not enough. I'm not able to fit in, you know, to them to the culture of boys. And and the enemy would use those situations and, you know, boys would call me very, you know, demeaning names that were terrible. And what you know, it was battle. And so started fighting those lies and you know, through my teenage years and really getting involved with pornography. And hadn't really found like guy was attracted to, you know, until college. But was really heavily involved in pornography and in various forms. in the midst of that time, could still see in the spirit world. And could see what was happening on the screen of those videos. could see who was being what was being played out in the scenes. And would still watch. was still watch them. And you know, this was challenging thing for some people, but the Lord was he was with me through all that. He never left me. You know, some people would they would think, you know, in the midst of our sin, you know, Jesus is not there. You know, he's not he's not present, he's gone. And when you're finished, you know, sinning or when you're finished doing something you shouldn't do, then he comes. But he's with you through the whole thing. He sees everything. He hears everything, he sees everything. And loves you so much when he says he'll never leave you, he means it. And he never left me. never left me. And some of the most powerful encounters had, you know, with Jesus, when had finished watching pornography and would run into the Lord's presence, would be like, no, you know, was screwed up and the Lord would just take me on these adventures with him, or would just get lost in the arms of God, you know, lost in the love of God. These tangible moments. These very tangible moments. And remember one conversation. remember one conversation had with Jesus. had finished watching scene in pornography and had this question with Jesus. And we were in the heavens and remember we were sitting on it looked like it was beautiful cloud, but it it don't know where where where it was, but it was awesome. And there was these beautiful lights and there were all these angels around that was sitting with Jesus and sitting very close to him. And he asked me, he said so, and this the honest truth. He said, so what did you think about that scene you watched, Micah? And thought, was like and don't know why was surprised. just mean knew he was like he knew it happened, but was like, why are we talking about this? You know, like And you know, in your presence, why are we mentioning this, Lord? You know? And he said, What what did you think about that scene? And and began to describe it to him and how that made me feel. How that made me feel and he listened to me and then he said Well, he said, Micah, want you to understand something. He said, No matter what pain you're in and how you want to cover that pain, he says, the only place you'll find healing and acceptance is in me. He said, What's happening in those scenes is pain. is pain. he said it's people pretending they're not in pain. And he says, and when you are watching that, he said there's an inner wound in you that you won't allow me to heal. You know, you won't allow me to heal. And said to the Lord, looked at him and said, Lord, said, sometimes just feel so lonely. And can believe said that because was right with him. So sometimes just feel so lonely. And Jesus smiled and he pulled me in really close. And then he said, You are not alone. And said, Lord, said, see in the spirit, have this prophetic gift, and you know, and but just feel like nobody knows me. Like, who has me? Who has Micah? You know? Who has Micah? You know, strong enough to hold Micah or, you know, who is who cares for Micah, turnbow, you know, who cares for me? You know, and came out of that in, you know, that beautiful encounter with Jesus. And that that was helpful for me because it allowed me to see where the Lord was wanting to heal. You know, in my heart. And remember him telling me, he said. Anytime that you feel that you are not understood or that you are alone, he said, remember, am with you in everything. He says, am with you in everything in all your emotions. Even in my design, like like my love language is touch. loved touch. there was like, you know, it was shocking to me. You know, had dealt with this culture shock too. Like it was shocking to me. That would be in in the heavenly places and would watch touch happen between men. That was just so wonderful and so pure. And this intimacy between men that was just so cool. And would come to the earth and then it's not here. And I'm like, What is going on? Why isn't it the same? You know, why isn't this the same? What doesn't what's happening? And that was that was hard. And then had, you know, the enemy on this side saying, Well, you want that, that makes you gay. You desire that. You're thinking about it that way. You love to hug, that makes you gay. You love this color, that makes you gay. You know, and started to understand there is the enemy is really wanting to manipulate, manipulate our identity so we lose the joy of the love of God over us, really. so yeah, that just that was process, an ongoing process, ongoing conversation, you know, with the Lord. And remember there's one point where wanted to see what it felt like to wear one of my sisters' dresses. And 'cause liked the colors of it. liked the designs of it. you know, wanted to see what it meant to wear one of my sisters' dresses. And remember going into their closet and and looking at the dresses. And was much younger here. And yeah, so was probably younger than eleven here. And remember saying, love that color blue. You know, love that color purple. And remember hearing Jesus say to my heart, because our parents taught us how to hear the Lord's voice when we were young. That's cool. remember hearing the Lord tell me, he said, love the color blue. And thinking and said, he Jesus loves the color blue. And then remember him saying, love the color purple. And he said, Micah, do you think the idea of purple came from girl or did it come from God? And said, it came from God. He said, Absolutely. He said, All the colors come from God. And he says, And if the colors come from God, Then that means enjoy and love those colors too. And thought, wow. And so then it shifted from me wanting to wear dress to me saying, want to be in the colors that God's in. You know, want to be in blue and and pink. want to dress and look just like my father. want to dress and look just like Jesus. You know, and remember that. that that conversation had with him. And so those little nuggets held on to, you know, while we walked through it. And you know, it was very hard. I'm not gonna pretend it was easy, that there were days where it's just like I'm clout clout nine. there there were days where was like, don't know if can keep doing this. don't know, Lord, if can finish. don't know, Lord. you know, this is so hard. And it is. Because it's it's has like said, it's an identity crisis inside of us that we're trying to find. And so it took me Yeah, over ten years to Through And he never left me. You know, he never left me. And he would show me the demons. Yeah, there are demons involved. There are. and yeah, remember him showing me the demons that were that would try to lie to me. There was one moment where was having very difficult night, just images in my head. And remember the room being filled with demons. Just filled with demons. And the demons were coming, you know, after me. And cried out to the Lord. said, Cried out to him. said, Jesus, please help me. Jesus, please help me. I'm saying, please help me. And Jesus appears and his robe is like fire, you know. And remember he's standing tall above me, powerful, you know, and am like on the floor. And remember holding on to his legs and my head just buried into his legs, just like just like that, trying to pull it together, trying to pull in that strength. And he took his hand and he began to wave fire above his head over just this beautiful, this flaming fire, and began to burn these demons. And they began to, you know, just Run away, you know. And it was real peaceful after that. It was really peaceful. And and he pulled me in really close. Cause like said, my love language is touching and it's just when he holds you, it's just the purest thing. And it's so beautiful. He held me so close. Help me so close. And then he said, I'm here and have you. I'm here and have you. And then everything disappeared. You know, he was gone and You know, and everything, you know, and thought again, you know, okay, surely after this encounter, am it's never those feelings are never gonna come back, you know, and they did. And say, no, said those feelings come back, no, you know, and this is in my college times here. And so I'm like, no, and you know, college guys are, you know, you can imagine what boys in the dorms are like. Yeah. Yeah, yep. and so trying to stay pure during that time, was just you know, and remember remember I'm walking through the hallways, you know, and guys are being guys. And one of the one of the roommates on the floor, he he said, you know. And I'm like looking down because I'm trying to like, you know, you you you know, no, you don't want this. Don't look at them, take charge of your eyes. Come on, Micah, don't, you know, just truly trying. And remember one guy came up to me and fully exposed. And I'm looking down and he's just being guy, you know. And then he says, You know, Micah, we believe that if they're if you're if you're gay, you know, and this is really hard for you, you know, then. Let us know. And I'm thinking, like, my gosh, what do say? What do do? Jesus, help me. You know, like was just crying out for help. Like, Jesus, please help me. And I'm saying these stories because these are these are scenarios that lot of people have dealt with that they don't really share about because they feel like it's, you know, they they don't want to feel dirty. They don't want to be judged. And just so you know, like no one judges you. The Lord does not judge you. He's not judging you. For being in situations like that that were so difficult that you really tried to, you know, do the right thing, you know? And it seems like all the cards are against you at that moment. And just said, no, no, I'm I'm fine, I'm fine. And walked really quickly and went back to my dorm and closed the door and said, Lord, said, please, said, please, please. said, really tried, I'm really trying. And feel the presence of Jesus. And he comes in to the room. didn't see him, but felt him. Comes into the room and then he said, Micah, he said, saw that. He's like, and you're not alone. Says, I'm with you. He says, I'm with you. I'm here. How did that make you feel? So just started talking to him about it. started talking to him about it. And he never, he listened. He never shamed me. So want to say this. Talking to Jesus through it is the best thing you can do. That's where healing really starts. Talk to him about everything. Everything. remember this one time have he and have special song and start listening to it in June because it was really song that like that really felt the presence of the Lord and it's not even Christian song, but he would speak to me through it. And remember this one particular time and it was real again, real struggle, real struggle. And said, Jesus, can please see you? Can please see you? need you, Lord. And feel myself enter into the heavens. And open my eyes and there's Jesus. And Jesus is, I'm I'm actually gonna post this, the full story, on my social media is in June, but see Jesus standing on the beach and the waters are crystal. And you could see this beautiful light. This it was like rip of heavens, and it was just beautiful. And knew that was the father. And Jesus had his hands in his pocket, barefoot, white pants, and they were rolled up by the ankles and this blue button shirt. His hair was blowing. and he he just looked awesome. Jesus is just so awesome. He's so beautiful. He's just he's amazing. got could could just linger. And into just how he is just magnificent. Jesus is magnificent. And he's standing there looking out, you know, on the waves and in the light. And just go up to him and put myself next to him. And he puts his head on top of my head and I'm with him. And then he says to me, What do you need? And said, And was coming up with all these reasons. There were so many reasons. And just said, Lord, just, just need you right now. just need you right now. And he looked put it and he kept his head there and he said, Micah, it's it's going to be okay. He said, This will not last forever. So this will not last forever. He said, Look, you see, you see your father in the distance. And said, Yes. And he said, That is your father's love. He said, That is your father's love. And said, Yes, it is. And he said, and you come from that place. You come from He said, what you need to understand is, he says, is that you are loved. do not condemn you. will never condemn you. He says, you are loved. And said, well, Lord, it's not what said, what I'm feeling, said, it's not right. It's not right. It's sin. It's not right. It's not right. And then Jesus, he didn't even say, like, yeah, that's right. You know what he said? He said, You're loved. All of that, what was experiencing, had already been defeated on the cross. It wasn't anything new. Jesus bled, his skin was ripped apart. All those things, he was put on cross for all of my shame and all of my sin. He he took it all. You know, and He wanted me to understand, he said that, he said, that is the past. He said, you are now in this future with me. You are loved. He said, so when these feelings come up, Micah, he says, remember, you are loved. And so we're just there together and come back to the earth. And so when those feelings would pop up, and again, had good days, bad days, would try to say, I'm loved. You know, am loved. am loved. I'm not alone. am loved. And remember remember the devil one time. remember the devil came to me. You know why he came? 'Cause he was losing. He was losing. Though felt like wasn't gaining any ground. felt quite like, you know. But he was seeing Christ's victory. See, your emotions and your feelings does not dictate rather there's victory. Okay. Our emotions and our feelings are super important because God has emotions. They matter to him. Yes, but we continue on. And we press on even when we are we feel the pressure of the wilderness. And so want to tell people do not quit even when it seems hard. Do not quit. It is not going to be sugar and rainbows all the time. It is not going to be like you're you're feeling like you're on top. You're going to feel like sometimes that you're just being you're being pulled through. And the key of going through these things is going through it. Okay. Some people think I'm not going. Well, you lost then. I'm not doing it. No, no. Even would say to Jesus, said, even if you have to drag me through it, my legs don't work because I'm so tired and you're just dragging me through it. said, That's I'll still say yes, even though I'm like, can't walk anymore, you know? Lord, I'm like, just drag me through it. said, because know that the key is getting through. And would say to the Lord, when would drag, He felt like He would drag me through it. say, I'll get up in minute. I'll get up in minute. I'll start walking. You know, just drag me through it, Jesus. Just say that. If that's what it comes down to, and you're just like, just don't know if can say no anymore. Tell Jesus that. Yeah. Tell Jesus that Lord, don't know if can say no anymore. don't know if can say yes anymore, but really want to say yes. really want to say no. Just pick me up or drag me through it or push me or tie rope to your side and you just walk and I'll just, you know. Be honest with him. That's so good. Be honest with him, because even in that there's deliverance and healing. Even in that there's deliverance and healing. So remember Satan came to me one time. And and was startled to see him. And he didn't look ugly. Satan never looks ugly. Okay. He's actually quite beautiful. What's what's terrible is his eyes. You can look into his eyes and you can see emptiness, sadness, depression, darkness, loneliness, deep sense of loneliness. but he's he looks like prince. He does not he's not like lot of people want to put make him red and little teeth and you know, this In all seriousness, who would listen to creature like that? You know, like let's be real. If some kind of creature came into your room and said, Hey, do this, and they had slime and boils and all over you. He'd be like, Well, who the heck are you? Get out, or don't want anything to do with you. You seem dangerous. No. But he looked like look like prince and he came and he peered and and he said, he's he he's very crafty how this hands out. And he said to me he said want to talk to you he said want to make deal with you he said just one time just one time you know say that you don't want this say that you don't want this you just want the freedom you just want peace You just want, he says, and I'll give you all of that. He said, will give you this peace. will give you everything that you really want on the inside. I'll give you the love that you need. You just need to tell me. You just need to tell me, Micah. Doesn't that sound familiar? Yeah. Yeah. That's so and and will and was like, don't remember put my hand on my face and said, help me, Jesus. Help me, Lord, help me, Jesus, help me. Help me, Lord. And then felt Jesus boom, like he got he bumped into me, you know, because he was like, you close to me. And I'm like, you know, Jesus is right there. And then Jesus didn't even look at Satan. Didn't even look at him. Jesus just put his arms around me like that. And then like this. And then he said, Micah, I'm here. I'm with you. And looked at Satan and said, No. And then he just disappeared. He just disappeared. You know, and then turn around, look at Jesus, and then Jesus gives this look like good, you know. You know, he was so proud of me, you know. But it's still Jesus is amazing because he he he he's person, so could tell in the inside he was like you know, like yes, you know. but he was just, you know, it's kind of like, you know, good job. All right, you know, then he disappears. I'm sorry, I've been talking so long. No, no. We just wanted you to flow and tell your story. If could interject real quick though, it's interesting to be like Was that the end? Wow. He came at the last moment to just make sure. he couldn't snare you one more time. That's so good. But it's interesting. It comes like It's almost like the mob boss. Yeah. I'll protect you. I'll Yeah. All these things and really just not sending his well, allegedly promising not to send his goons after you. Yeah. It's like I'll stop torturing you if you Yeah. Yeah. It's it's Satan, he he is so desperate and alone that all he has are bribes. Yeah. All he has are bribes. You know, and and it says in the word, you know, submit to God. You know, resist the devil and he will flee. You know, and begin when Jesus came submit to him. And that's one thing do with any struggle go through. submit to God first. Where is the truth? What truth am going to submit to? You know? Am going to submit to the lie that am anxious? It's not denying that you feel anxious, but I'm not gonna I'm not going to submit to that that identity because that's not in the kingdom of God. Okay. Sure, can say, yeah, feel anxious because that's that's true. That's how feel, but that's not my identity. Jesus said that his peace is what he gives me. Yeah. So submit to Jesus' peace. Yes. Yes. So submit to his peace. You know, and so when was going through the the homosexuality, would submit to anything that Jesus would tell me who am. would submit to that. Now again there were times where so you know sometimes I'm like, crap, messed up there, you know. Get right back up and submit to him again. You know? The key is to get up and keep trying. Get up and keep trying. love what you said earlier about even when you're in the middle of it going through it. he would ask you and you would just start talking to him about it. Yeah. That's exactly what he says, come to me, or it's an illustration, come to me, you who are weary and burdened, and give you rest. Yes. And just mean he's he's he is the true therapist. He's the true therapist. Right. to listen to you, but not just to listen to to ask you the right questions and to tell you the truth. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. One one thing just want to bear witness to was something you said earlier about how you know, it's it's clear Jesus is not ashamed of us in our sin. And even in the midst of your struggle with pornography, like I've I've struggled with pornography unfortunately. And wanna bear witness to is the there was one time specifically remember and in the midst of my struggle in the midst of my sin. heard the Holy Spirit whisper so clearly like I'm still here. That's right. In in tone and in could just tell there was no shame, there was no condemnation There was no Yes. Anything that that it was just complete understood that he meant I'm not going anywhere. Hiding my eyes from you. Not ashamed to look at you, I'm not ashamed to be with you. Even though you're choosing this right now. Yes. And and of course it was like it's like, okay, well I'm done right now. This is "You are awesome" just weeping in that moment. Yeah, just just wanted to to share that and testify like that is absolutely true. Yeah. It's absolutely true. Yeah. mean it that's right. It it's we are the ones that have misunderstanding of what holiness is. See, Satan wants us to think, you see, he's such little doo-doo because he'll just be like, you're supp you know, he'll take the scriptures and twist it to condemn us. you are supposed to be holy because God says be holy as he is holy, and you just did that. So you shouldn't pray for little bit. You need to do things to clean yourself off. When we don't realize that the holiness is the love of God, holiness is not set of these rules. That's why the the that's why Jesus had to really show us what God was like. You know, because God created the love of God, He He had all these things, and even the people, Israel, His people couldn't even fulfill it. They had to continually do these sacrifices. Over and over again. It just showed them that they could not be holy without him, without his holiness. And when Jesus comes, Jesus is the face of holiness. He is the blazing, radiant glory of God's face. He is the love of God. He is the holiness of God. You know, and so we Satan twists that and he makes it seem like you know, well, you got to do the right thing, you got to. Pray, you got to fast seventy two days, you got to, you know, don't sing immediately, you know, don't talk to God immediately 'cause he's not gonna come because he just saw what you did, you know, and you gotta be holy. No, it's the love of God. It's the love of God. remember Jesus standing before me one time, and again had bad struggle. And he stood before me and he kissed my forehead and he said, My righteousness is on you. You know, my righteousness is on you. And thought. There's nothing literally can do to make myself clean. It is him. He makes me clean. And began to understand when it says to put on Christ. You know, he makes you clean. You know, and remember having this encounter with Father. And this one was was beautiful with God the Father because talked to God the Father about it too, and Holy Spirit, you know, they were. Both extremely different, you know, when talking to him, not in sense of like the personal like they were, you know, one was more serious than other, but they address different things. Where Jesus was really the friend, the one that was like, Hey, we're in this together, you know, you know, understand, underst you know, know what tempt you know, like he's the one that's understands what temptation feels like. But then you have father who's like this Blanket, you know, the safety. And remember with father, and and I'm on I'm on the approach the throne of God and see the father. And this again, when people tell me you can't see the face of God, I'm like, well, tell him that because he was like, you know. And we're also on the other side of Christ. Yeah. And again, it's just misunderstanding of God and His Holiness. Holiness doesn't repel you, it draws you in. Yeah. Okay. His holiness doesn't it draws you in. So when you when you stand before God the Father, it is really you're you you can't help but see him, his face, his glorious face, you know? And it's is it's so blazingly wonderful and so beautiful, overwhelming, but at the same time just like so full of love. So you know, when people tell me they can't see the face, I'm like, because just I'm like, You're gonna see it anyway eventually. You know You know, it's like saying there's no such thing as air. It's like, well, there is. So but you know, remember, mean he's family. He's like if we're sons and daughters, then why wouldn't we not be able to Yeah, exactly. So and you mean to tell me that God is so powerful that He can't control His power that He would just kill us. Like, I'm too powerful for you to see me. And it's like, Well, Lord, mean, I'm sure you could if that was the case, you would just scale it back little bit, you know, but that's not even that's that's not even an issue. Like to me, that's like, okay, either just believe it or just not and just we'll get there. You know, everybody's gonna get there. So but remember being with the father and and he his face was just smiling. And he picks me up and he holds me and I'm in the father's father's lap. And then he said to me, he said, Micah, and he was so jolly. He said, Micah, he he is happy. Father is so happy, so so happy. So powerful, but so happy and joyful and all the good, all the goody goodies, you know. And he said, Micah, and said, Yes, and he said, and he just jolted. He said, am so proud of you. And said, Why? He said, Because minute ago you said no. You said no to the temptation. And said, did. But said, but Father, The last minute said yes. And he said, don't remember. And said, What do you mean? said, he said, don't remember. What are you talking about? And said, and I'm thinking, what does he mean? And he's like, don't remember. He said, don't remember. And thought, I'm sitting here thinking, I'm like, what how can the God who knows everything not remember? You know, how is he? And then it dawned on me. He forgets our sin as far as the east is from the west. He remembers them no more. And that became reality to me. Like all that's in his mind, all that in his mind is that moment when we chose him. Yes. Yes. And then he looked at me and he said, When see you, see my son. see his finished work. see you as his bride, completely and fully and dedicated to him. see you as his friend. You know, he says, that's who see. And he just jostled and and and and bopped and everything. He was just so excited. He was so excited. That's awesome. You know, so excited. So want to say this want to say this gently. It is it seems like big deal to walk through, and it is, it's hard. But to the Father, to Jesus, and Holy Spirit, they're not bent out of shape. They're not up there being like, Father is, he sees you as your future. Jesus knows and understands everything. And Holy Spirit, He fills all those spaces that you need. You know, they're not, it is not hard for them. You know, and they're not up there or over there or wherever being like, we gotta talk about this again. They're not like that. They're so patient and they're so kind. So mean could go on and on with stories like that. We're just in continuing encounters because people will always ask me, like, did you see any spirit when you were dealing with that? Yeah, did. you know, yeah, absolutely. but that that's what it was like. And remember finally coming out of it, you know, where it disappeared. 2012. And it was gone. mean, it was literally gone. remember walking up to class on college campus. And would every time walk up to class, look down to see if could see Jesus' feet. You know, because would love to walk with him to class. You know, and would sometimes would see his feet there, and you see him walking, and look up and he'd be smiling, he'd disappear real quick, you know. but would look down to see if could see his feet and and Look up and there he is. We're just walking to class together. And then remember right when was walking into the building, said, wait minute. said, It's where did it go? said, This is it's gone. said it literally, it was like it just died. You'll Yeah, the feelings, everything. It just was... it just died. and said it took me, you know, while to get there, but it was just gone. And remember thinking, like, Lord, it's it's gone. So it's it's gone. And looked at it for Jesus and and said Jesus, what happened? And Jesus said, It has always been gone. He said, What happened now is that your identity is now in me. He says, now this literally, this struggle, this sin has no hold on you anymore. It has nothing to cling to. He said there's no room for it anymore. He says, because you have come in fully into Christ. Mm-hmm. You know just have to interject for second. Yeah. So we're we're in Orlando and there's some thunderstorms outside that are supposed to be rolling in and don't know if the the camera picked it up or the microphone picked it up earlier when you said the father chose me there was one lone thunder clap. It was like boom. It's like then think nothing for little bit. know there was little bit of roll when you said it died and then again when you said our identity. Yeah. That is so cool. little bit in case the bike didn't pick that up. Thunder, right? Yes. Speak Lord, yes, yes, Lord, yes. But yeah, we have we have some questions for you. Thank you so much for sharing your story. And what strikes me in all of that, maybe can kind of recap or summarize what kind of what heard from you. Yeah. But first of all, this whole thing, this whole episode really is is coming up to me. It's really about the love of the father. Yeah. And and whether it's same sex attraction or whether it's pornography in general, whether it's anxiety or whatever person is struggling with or is tempted with, All of it comes back to search for or desire for and deep need for the love of the Father. Yes. And their identity in him. And so like what st what started for you was an attack on your identity. Yeah. And just little things like there are cultural things. You know intimacy, kissing, touch affectionate, touch and things in other cultures in the world today. Yeah. Between men is not unusual, you know. Yeah. And yet here in the States it's it's like in at least in many many parts of our culture is just uncomfortable. It's yeah it's taboo, you know. Yeah. Colors and then all these things that you associate with masculinity or femininity that are some are legit and some are just cultural. And and you begin to reinterpret who you think you are as child. Yeah. Based on that the enemy uses that. So first your identity. Yeah. and then the pornography trap. Yeah. And it is trap. It's such demonic trap. Yeah. that tries to defile us and and to snare us and draw us deeper into that perversion. It's like what's you think you said earlier, it's it's you put your foot in and it's it'll kinda it's go little bit further. That might have been before we started recording the episode. Yeah, but it's like swamp, which we're know about in Orlando. But you know, you take you take one step in and and things like pornography any sin, but it sucks you deeper and it leads into other things even just reinforces and the devil tries to reinforce that trap on you. Yeah. And the way out of it, the Lord really brought you through just constantly reminding you, you're loved, I'm with you. Yes. That's not who you are. This is who you are. That's right. You are who say you are. And the exposure that happened in the garden. In the garden they were naked and not ashamed. Yeah. But the exposure that happened because of sin and the uncovering. and I've heard some interesting theories about that, but whatever that means, or whatever that actually happened there, the Lord reversed in clothing us in his righteousness. When it says he he gives us robe of righteousness. Yes. You literally physically experienced that. Yes. And saw that in in real way that that just you like know that. Yes. And yet you just describing it the way that you did still struck me like, whoa, this is yeah it really, really, really means it. Yes. You are covered. You wear his righteousness like clothing. Yes. And it covers your nakedness and it covers what you feel ashamed of and Yes. And and it also has the property of being able to cleanse you actually. That's right. That's good man. That's good. mean just to say about that, it's just like the more stories you hear from people's experience as yours, even in heaven and and others that we've heard is like the more the the word choices are literally what they are. Like people have heard God's voice like rushing water and I'm yeah literally hearing, mean don't you know, it's like literally sounds and feels like rushing water. One person that we had saw story, but yeah. just just wanted to ask it like couple things is like you had mentioned how you felt lonely and just also cause this could go to person who is lonely. Yeah. felt lonely myself when was child. Like no one got me and actually played with boys because don't know, it was just like jumping over fences and digging sandboxes was more fun than playing with Barbies. Yeah, mean played with with girls, lot of girls. th I've loved color and painting and mean that would yeah, understand. Mm-hmm. Well, and just see is like that people are switching that on people and saying, Well, if you like this, like if you're one weirdest one heard was if you don't like your voice or think it sounds deep on voice recording, then you are gay or lesbian or whatever. Like that is not at all to say 'cause was trained in marriage and family therapy and went to secular school and it's so interesting to me how just just for the record, no disrespect to people who who don't believe in God, who are doing their best in their mind to and their understanding to try to help people. honor that, respect that. It's just what the Bible says in Judges is one of the examples in the book of Judges where there was lot of bad things, people did lot of bad things, yeah, believing they were doing the right thing. It says everyone did what was right in their own eyes. Yeah. It was chaos. So just Just for that for the record. but anyway, what's interesting to me is they'll teach about things about masculinity and femininity aren't well. Like they'll teach about things masculine and feminine are cultural and culturally imposed and people should be free, especially with the gender stuff. Yeah. People should be free to express themselves how they want. But then at the same time, they'll say, well, but if you don't conform to the normal cultural standard, then that means you're like even physically, genetically, you know, or mentally, whatever, however they perceive it, you know, the their theory of that. are the opposite or somewhere between. It's like, wait, wait, wait. Is it is it is it something endemic to our nature and what we are, or is it cultural and made up you can't have it both ways. Mm-hmm. I'm not saying that to argue with anybody. Yeah. But and But it's just to make some think. It's just yeah, just think about that. It doesn't yeah. That's not logically congruent. Yeah. and for anybody who's believer struggling with with this thing and who might be tempted to to to believe some of the arguments in in favor of well can can love Jesus and I'm not hurting anyone but I'm just this is who am. It's not consistent with the scripture. It's just not consistent with what Jesus says. And it's not who you are. It's not who you are. Right. Mm-hmm. No, that's true. No, that truth, that that's truth, and it needs to be it needs to be said. You know, used to like said, used to took ballet because liked to to wear the sparkles and loved making the girls pretty. loved it. loved pas de deux, loved to partner because loved loved it when would pick up the girl and put her on my shoulder, and then people would be like, yay, she's so pretty. love that. And it just made me so happy. loved watching them come out in their tutus and would go to my sister's recitals. loved watching them and in their tutu in their tutus and their point shoes and and all that. And thought that was just so beautiful. But people would say, you're gay. No, no, no. just like tutus. You know, you know, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. Let's let's let's be no. It we we we are so locked into being like everybody else that we lost our in- That's why Jesus being physical man and restoring us physically, sexually is so important to the healing process. Yeah. Because God made man and woman, and he made them separate. He didn't go whoop. He didn't. Man, woman, and there are qualities of them that are unlike the other for reason to represent something far beautiful and far deeper, which won't go into, but they're they represent an amazing aspect of God. But what's so unique about God is that in the midst of our gender, He puts in unique things. that make us become even more beautiful who we are in our genders. Yeah. You know? mean, remember said, Lord, just when would comb my sister (I would sneak) and would comb my sister's Barbie doll hairs. love doing that. loved it. Because love to make it shiny. even remembered asking her how to braid their hair, her doll hairs. And remember saying Yeah, love doing that. And remember saying, and then had the boy around the streets said, you do that, you're gay, you know. And remember saying, like, and felt disappointed, you know. And then the Lord told me, He said, Who made hair? And said, You did. said, You did. He said, Yes. He said, gave women the long, beautiful hair. He said, gave that to them. He said, made hair beautiful and shining. Then Jesus. He peered for me and his hair was blowing because it talks about in Song of Salmon how his hair is black like ravens. You know, his hair was blowing, it was long. said, Wow, his hair is so beautiful. Hehehehe You know, like we just need to really step into truth. Bis be hair doesn't make anybody gay or lesbian or straight. No, hair is hair. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and we're allowed to enjoy how beautiful hair is. We're color is color. We're allowed to enjoy the used to play with my sisters my went went to Cinderella birthday party with one of our church friends. And they passed down these little glass slippers. And love the glass slippers because they were glass and they were pretty. And would would get little plastic tray and would would watch my gosh, was so silly. would watch the show called Lord of the Dance because love to watch it was an Irish tap Irish dance thing. cool. And loved it because it was production. loved watching the men be strong and the women be pretty, and would take the little glass slipper and Tap with them. You know, tap with them. But remember one little boy, and you know, kids are kids, but again, it's culture thing. They say, yeah, glass slipper, ew, you're you know, you're gay. And like, remember thinking, like, no, I'm I'm not. just really like the glass slipper and like the way it sounds. You know, like the way it sounds. So it's just the enemy comes in and he really wants to destroy us to our core, you know, our freedom and and who we are in Jesus as people, as individuals. just want to say so after you've said all that, because know that there are some people who have said is like it doesn't matter, you know, if have long hair, it doesn't matter because even we'll maybe we'll use what you know God created it, you know. Yeah, I'm allowed to have it. one thing was hearing, at least in my heart, was like if it causes you to sin though, then that should be where you need to Make changes. Yeah. You make the change because like well then some people like in Korea even think some men even wear makeup out there. And so it's like but it's yeah. Or Scottish kilts are yeah, yeah. Not skirts Absolutely. Or anybody watching this, there is some Scottish heritage here. But just the point of like or kimonos, Japanese kimonos, it's yeah, yeah. It's it's it's what is it? It it is bit relative to culture. But the point is are you trying to embody masculinity in the way that your culture does? Yeah. Or are you trying to embody femininity in the way that your culture does? And are you honoring God in that? Mm-hmm. That's That's really it may look different at each culture and and society, but yeah. That's what it's about. Micah, if can say one thing just because want to forget. feel like need to say this. No, that's mean that was mainly what was just wanted to make point that if it causes you to sin, you know, it says is if your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. Yeah. So if it's your hair, cut it off. Yeah, mean couldn't watch. There were when was walking through this, couldn't watch. And I'm remember my mom, my parents were so involved in this too. And remember my mom, like if something like we'd be watching TV in commercial like The Bachelorette or The Bachelor would come on, my mom would just turn my head, you know, because that would that was stumbling, you know? So you sometimes you do have to do things like that to to for make some changes, you know, to help move in that direction. Of the freedom that Jesus wants to give you. You know, and that's why say everyone's story is you have to listen to Holy Spirit because everyone's story is unique to them and their process. You know, some people, have to cut my hair. Well, why? Like knew guy who literally he had didn't have any same-sex issues or trans issues. It was just that his hair represented rebellion and he grew it out to be rebel. And the Lord said, Cut your hair. So he cut it. But My hair was long. You know, my hair was long. This didn't mean rebellion. grew my hair out because you know, like to being curly, you know, but he had to cut his because it represented rebellion. So you have to make you know encourage people. What is Jesus doing in you? Yeah. And your your process of healing is is individual. Yeah. We get into problem where we start saying it's like that way for everyone, like they have to do these. Five, six, seven steps always know. It is such an individual healing and story and process. And what we need to do is we need to encourage people to Jesus and encourage what is God saying to you that's lined up to the scriptures and be there to discern, be like to say, like what you said, no, the scriptures do say this and be clear with it. Yeah. Yeah. Because that's also an issue. We want to be so wrapped up in God's love that we end up saying, like, Well, we'll just be leaning on that. We just won't no no no. Scripture is clear. And that is also love. Yeah, 'cause Paul didn't say he said, Is should just sin aboundingly? Greece can abound as well. Right. That's perfect lead in to what wanted to say. 'Cause this whole episode, the reason we're doing this podcast, the reason we're doing this this particular episode with Micah is because we want to tell you the truth in love. Yeah. Yeah. With so much love of the Father. It is for compassion's sake and for the goodness of God that we wanted to share this. Not to condemn anybody, put anybody down. Right. Also, one of the things that you know, in working as as therapist pre previously currently I'm more of coach now for some reasons, You're licensed, but you're of am licensed counselor. I'm currently working as coach, to be clear. Sure. And but but in working as therapist, you know, sometimes in Christian environment, sometimes in secular environment. I've I've worked with clients before who who have struggled with this issue and some who some who were believers, some who were not or who were raised in Christian household, but weren't are kind of maybe exploring their faith, but weren't sure they believed it and were kind of just doing their thing. And what always broke my heart is hearing, especially those who grew up in Christian environment. that the way that the people, the Christians around them treated them in the midst of their struggle, in the midst of their — or even if they fully embraced what you know they didn't believe in God totally and they were just this is who am and whatever. But but we were called we were called to treat people with the love of God. Yeah. Yes, tell the truth in love. Like this is sin. This is not who you were created to be. Etc. But but to treat people with contempt or to pick on them or to bash them or To anything like that in the name of holiness, you do not understand the holiness of God. Since sin separates us from God, that's why He came to call us and draw us near again. We we actually separate ourselves from God when we sin. That's what's Adam. That's we see that in Adam and Eve in the very beginning. When they sinned, they hid. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. So, like Micah was saying earlier about the the love of God, holiness is about the love of God. Yes. It is unto love and for love and by love that we are consecrated as holy. Being holy as am as am holy is not only command, it's promise. Yeah. And so just if you are Christian, if you are believer in Jesus, and disciple of Jesus, let this be reminder to you if you don't know this already and don't understand this already, when you're speaking. Or with somebody or interacting with somebody who is same-sex attracted, they struggle with that desire, that temptation. Whether or not they're believer, you are to treat them with love and respect and kindness. And in the course of an actual conversation about God and whatever you can like, if you're not familiar with this stuff that we're talking about and how God sees things in this way, then familiarize yourself with it. Yeah. Like listen to this again. You know, listen to something. Other stuff with the same heart with you know preserving the holiness of God, what is true, what is not true, but also ministering the love of God so that when you speak with people, you can speak to them with kindness and love about who they are in Christ, how God sees them, and not what they are not, or or what they are tempted with, or condemning people. Yeah. Yeah. And don't know if I'm gonna have the right words here, but we also as believers should make sure that we aren't condoning or enabling someone. by giving them makeup, by giving them, you know what mean? They have an they have enough, I'm sure, that they can find. So like 'cause know that some people will be like, well, in love, I'm gonna accept this person and then even help, you know what mean, be there for like it's almost like bubbling them into this okay. place. don't know if you would yeah add to that, but like just how — that would actually be good question for you Micah. know you've got to go at the top of the hour. my gosh. We'll make sure we we wrap it up with the next ten minutes. But how if you if you were talking with or you're talking with them now, you're speaking to people who who believe in God and want to love people And and treat people with appropriate kindness and respect. Like we're saying. Maybe they have kid or someone. Yeah. Or if they have child or brother or or friend and who's going through the struggle and at whatever stage they're at, how to speak to somebody that to that person in love, how to call them higher without condemnation or judgment, but also not condoning sin or or tolerating sin. think, well you're you know what just do your best and you're okay. Yeah God understands he forgives you etc. You know what mean? Like how would you approach that? That's wonderful question. when was in college, there was friend of mine who was straight, kinda well, you know, you weren't really sure what they what's going on. we would use the we would pray, we would have these prayer moments on on campus and we would pray for the the campus. And she knew, you know, what was walking through. Now Years later, you know, it flipped to where I'm healed and set free. And then she decides to marry woman, be lesbian and marry woman. And remember she looked so light, she looked happy, she actually dressed like woman, you know, and seemed confident and everything. And she was wonderful friend. And you know, remember she she invited me to her wedding. And she said, would like to invite you to to my wedding. And thought, well, and I'm taking taking to the Lord. I'm like, what do do? I'm like, okay, you know, this is something new, you know, what do do? So said, Lord, said, please Show me what to say, give me, you know, the right words. And this compassion came on me. And this is what came out of my mouth. won't say her name, but said, so and so. really truly believe that God wants you to be happy. truly believe that God wants you to be happy. But how see what true joy looks like in the scriptures, it doesn't match the life that you're wanting to live. And said, and love you, I'll always love you, will always be your friend. But have to make stand on what believe the Bible teaches. have to make stand on that. And I've again said it's I'm not, am not condemning you. What what's happening now is have to choose what believe Jesus stands for. And so what we have to do, and this is going to be an issue in the churches. We have to stand for what is true. Standing for what is truth is love. It is love. Doesn't mean you shame them. You're not shaming anybody. You're not shaming anybody. You're not making someone feel guilty. My parents had to tell me the truth. They always love me, but my mom is prayer intercessor lady. She's prophet, full of love. But she told me, she told me, she said, God didn't make you gay. She said, You are my son, you are loved. This she told me the truth with so much love, but she also separated where the lie was and where the truth was. She did it in such love, but it was clear. When we speak the truth, when we speak the truth and we do it with the love of God, we have to believe that it is bringing some form of healing and deliverance somewhere. You know, and never told told my my friend that and she said thank you for saying that. She said respect your your beliefs and she's continued to live that way, married and has child. and still continue to talk about how the Lord set me free. And so she felt like it was time for us to kind of end the friendship because she just couldn't agree, you know, with me. And remember she sent me message and she said, love you. said, just gonna have to separate. And and said, understand. said, love you too. said, but this is what believe the Bible teaches. And said, and I'm praying for you. said, and know, said, know Jesus loves us. Jesus said He who hears my word and obeys, they are the one they love me. You know, and When we have to we have to be able to make that decision, to make that stance and say, this is what God teaches. You know, this is what the this is what the Bible says, this is what the Bible teaches. So the best thing you can do is to is to be honest, you know, to be honest and respectful and kind. You know, and respect and know what you're dealing with. Know that you're dealing with spirits. You have to be able to separate the spirit from the person that's going on, you know, and know know what you're what you're dealing with. Yeah. do have question regarding that know we have only couple minutes here, but just hopefully this lands right. But as the ending. but in that you told her that 'cause know this could apply to other sins and other things that people are struggling with. 'cause like my first thought is like do go? Would the Lord want me to go? And I'm sure in each situation it could be different that God says go or don't go. but do know like some people will be like, well, love them, they're family, or it it you know, whatever the like said, the sin, or they don't agree or agree with the marriage. and could even say it's like my hands are tied, it's their decision, they're older, whatever it may be. so my question is like, because Jesus would have gone, right? Jesus Jesus was with you through all your sinning, right? So like should be showing up and being there so that they don't discount me as person that they can come to. So just what what are your don't know if you had any thoughts that without again being like it's cookie cutter answer all the time. Yeah. It's it's really think even when I'm saying this, it's kinda is like, are you appeasing them or appeasing God? Like which one is it? Really? super hard because and guys, this this is this are these are conversations that we as people in the church in the body of Christ need to have, these conversations. Part of the reason why is because we're not willing to entertain and ask these questions and say, Well, what do we do? Because remember saying that same thing to my parents and my sister. What do do? said, love this person. You know, they are they were my friends and and they say that they love God and everything and like what do do? But had to talk to the Lord about it. had to say, Okay, Lord, this is what your word says, but and I'm standing with your word, but what what do do? And felt like had to listen to the Lord's voice. Tell me what to do. Now we have to be real. Sin is sin, and sin does not like Jesus. Okay. It does not like Jesus. So we're always going to face that reality that no matter how kind we are, or no matter how honest we are, but respectful and everything, that sin, like you said, ultimately separates us from God. It's not going to enjoy the presence of Jesus. It's just not. So we have to be willing to say, well, felt like this is what the Lord. said I'm standing on what God said. might lose friend, you know, or might lose family member for standing for what's true. We have to be willing to to walk through that. We have to be willing to make that sacrifice for Jesus, you know, and Jesus He is the one that ultimately knows their heart. He knows how to rescue them, you know, and remember saying, Lord, can't can't go to the wedding. said, just just can't do it. And remember Jesus said to me, he said, Micah, said, yes. He said, will never, he said, will never shame so and so. He said, do you trust me enough? Do you trust me enough to take her on journey of healing as took you on journey of healing? So then my prayers changed. It changed from, well, Lord, should go or shouldn't go? But to praying that the journey that this person, so and so, is on, that the love of God, the truth of God. Would invade and be there. Because that's what it took for me. That's what sets people free is truth. Is his truth. It's that what sets people free is not me actually showing up at the wedding or whatever, you know. What sets people free is truth. So we have to get God's truth and we have to pray it. Pray God's truth. Lord, pray, and so even to this day, just pray, you know, for so and so that they would experience the truth and the love of God of their story. Because have have when since sharing my story, and again won't give off names because of privacy, but my story couple of years ago, it when would share it, there were two men who were married and had son. And shared my story, and got chewed out for it, of course. but got message from them where they it moved them so powerfully. To point to where they press they were pressing in from freedom. And they separated. Experienced now. This is see, only God can do this, only God can do it. They they separated. Each man found lovely wife and had kids of their own, but that boy. Boy said, now have two daddies and two mommies. And he says, and have two siblings. And it's so cool. It was like the Lord just redeemed and restored the whole thing in way that only he could to where because one of the concerns was what do we do about our kid? You know, what do we do about our kid? See, when we just stand for truth, when we stand for truth. Believe in the word of God, believe in God's power and his presence. He does things like that. There like when they told me that, said, my gosh, said, there's no way. Like, Lord, only you can do miracles like that. So we have to trust in the miracle-working power of God. God can do anything. Anything. And these men have, like said, they are doing awesome. And it's not about And want to say this being free isn't about becoming straight or finding the opposite gender to marry. That's not why you're getting free. Being free is to become who Christ has called you to be, which is greater than anything of this world. Some people say, well, if I'm going to be free, then that means that need to start liking women. No, no, no, no. That's not what it's about. Because there are people who like, you know, who like the opposite sex and they're in blah blah blah. You know, it ain't about that. You know, it's about us stepping into becoming who Jesus says we are to the fullest. God wasn't healing me to be straight. He was healing me to be Micah. Micah, who He created, which is far greater than. Than what could ever imagine. It says that his thoughts are more for us are more numerous than the grains of sand. That's lot of thoughts. That means God has lot of thoughts about us. So I'm stepping into what who God says am. You know, that's where we're going. Yeah. That's where we're going. Because want to say that because some people who may watch this will be like, well, that means if I'm if if I'm fully healed, then have to start liking women. It's not about that. It's not about that. That's not why you're doing it. That is cap. That's not why you're doing it. It's so it's about you becoming who Jesus says you are. Who you are to your core. Who Jesus says you are. And that's what happened to those men. They became who Jesus says they are. And God just Yeah. The rest was the fruit of that. Yep. Beautiful. But Mi- Micah we're about five minutes or so. don't want to make you late to anything else that's just to just to recap out. sounds like when you were listening to God, it was what the scripture says, like you're gonna be before kings and emperors and whoever else, you know, you might and I'll give you the words to say of the hour. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was just such beautiful example of that speaking to your friend. Yeah. So gracious and humble. And just love that. Yeah. Thank you so much for spending this time with us. you're welcome. You're welcome. Thank you for having me. You're welcome. Can pray for people who are watching this and and yeah, Father, just thank you for the Holy Spirit. Thank you, Holy Spirit. God, thank you who the Sun sets free is free indeed. thank you, Lord, that every prison door is opening right now in Jesus' name. And Lord, thank you that every person is on journey of healing and wholeness. In Jesus' name and Lord, release greater understanding of the love of God for those who are watching. Lord, thank you, those who are dealing with same-sex attraction or homosexuality, and they just want encouragement how to how to figure this whole thing out. Lord, just want to speak to them and say, You are not alone. God sees you, He hears you. Keep doing the right thing, keep trying. Don't stop trying. God is with you and He will strengthen you. He will carry you and He promises that you will have victory because Jesus paid the ultimate price. And what Jesus has is now yours. So rebuke every spirit of loneliness. rebuke every spirit of rejection in the name of Jesus. Lord, rebuke every spirit of confusion in the name of Jesus. And release the truth of God, the joy of God, the love of God, the laughter of God, and the strength, the inner strength of God, and the peace of God. In Jesus' name. And Lord, we just thank you that the day of deliverance and freedom is coming. It's coming. It is coming. Don't be afraid, it is coming. We know it's hard, but you can do it. You can do it as someone who knows how it feels, you can do it. Don't give up. Thank you, Lord. In Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. So good. Thank you. Thank you everybody for watching. we hope this was encouraging for you, inspiring. Yeah. And just you just feel the love of God flowing through the screen to you right now. Because he loves you very much. He has an amazing biophere. In Jesus' name. In Jesus' name. Thanks for watching.